I am frequently asked what happens in a Life Coaching Session, especially on a social level where people are interested in what it is you do. The most common misconception I find is that people think that they are going to be told what to do to improve their lives. To me, you can get that from friends, family, colleagues, bosses etc. who all have ideas and opinions about how you should best live your life! The coaches who work with me as their client, would not have my business if they had a whole load of answers to give me! You spend much of your life surrounded by people telling you what to do - and if you’re not happy from all their input and training, then surely try a different approach!

In my life coaching sessions, and indeed also my executive coaching sessions,  the majority of the actual work is done by the client. They are, after all, the person with all the questions and often the vast majority of the answers. From my own experience, working with good coaches, it feels to me like you are sitting there having a conversation with another version of yourself. The coach asks questions that prompt you to think about your topic in a different way, or helps you consider options and outcomes for the situation. Frequently, the coach asks questions that you feel painful or you perhaps do not want to face up to, but my experience of being on the receiving end of those questions is that you have the most to gain from answering them.

During a life coaching session, the coach will frequently not speak and allow silence to flourish. My experience of these moments as a client, are wonderful - when faced with nothing else to think about than what is on your mind, the thoughts, ideas and answers that flow from you are incredible. The challenge we have in our lives is that we do not normally make time or space for this silence in which we can allow these thoughts, ideas and answers to emerge. As well, we do not generally have someone with us to keep us on track when our mind inevitably wanders.

One of the greatest gifts a coach can offer, besides helping to make change and happiness in your life, is the opportunity to be truly heard and understood. There are so few people in our lives who really “get” us or who have the time to do so and I find that many people who I coach, have not previously had the opportunity at all. Sometimes in my life coaching sessions, just a half-hour or hour of being understood can generate incredible changes in mood, emotion, thoughts, feelings and enable people to feel happy.

I believe there is a magic in coaching that is very difficult to describe, however the great thing is that it’s easy to enjoy the benefits, even if you can’t describe the magic.

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