October 10, 2007

What Goes Around, Comes Around

Today I’d like to look at the old adage, “What goes around, comes around”, from the perspective of what I like to think of as a circle of giving and receiving. I personally spent a few years in a place of looking for recognition and sadly received very little. In fact the times I did receive recognition, I was too blinkered by my belief that I wasn’t getting any, to actually notice it.

This pattern continued for me until I discovered the Law of Reciprocity - that states that you have to give in order to receive. For me, this was a whole new concept and I set about giving away recognition in the hope that I would in turn receive some.

However, this was not successful for me at all, and it really took some coaching, a few years ago, for me to determine why. All the time I was giving away recognition, it was on condition that it would be returned to me - to complete the circle of giving and receiving. Because it was conditional recognition, it didn’t really serve any purpose or meaning for either me or the recipient.

My realisation of this enabled me to change my perspective and I no longer give recognition because I feel I have to, in fact I no longer even have need of recognition - although I enjoy it as much as anybody. My detachment and deeper understanding has meant that I now give recognition when I feel I wish to and also I happily and gratefully receive any recognition given to me with no expectations.

This idea of unconditional giving and unconditional receiving - where you are both able to freely give and receive - applies to anything in life, not least of which money, joy and love. I would certainly stress at this point - do not give away anything that you have an attachment to. If there is any doubt in your mind that you are doing this simply to receive in return, then there are conditions on your giving that will break the flow.

There is some very interesting reading on this subject to be found in the Conversations With God series of books by Neale Donald Walsch: When we give something away, the Universe automatically assumes that we have that thing - otherwise how could we give it away! In the case of love and joy, giving love and joy unconditionally will serve to increase the love and joy you have and experience - the same is true of tangible things.

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Dan O'Neil's Personal Development Blog

I'm a Life Coach based in the Midlands, UK. I have helped hundreds of people to improve their circumstances and achieve their goals in life. This blog is a series of my thoughts and ideas on self improvement and personal development.

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